What a great day. Maybe this is because I slept completely through the night. Maybe my new found way to meditate is helping. I'm just a beginner -- mind you -- but maybe....Ever since yesterday, I have been getting stronger in my mind to try to have my LIFE back even if it might be temporary till I get my final results this next Wednesday, March 30. Either way, Jim, Ashley and I are on hiatus from the deep discussions. Trying to have a sense of routine I'm finding is so important. I must say, even though I had a setback on Wednesday night, I feel there were so many lessons that were learned. I learned I'm not ready to take on a group activity with other cancer survivors just yet; I am not going to absorb someone else's pain or anguish or genuine angst; I am only surrounding myself with love, patience, positivity, BALANCE; I am being more genuine -- which has been needed for a long time -- at a very deep level; I am taking back my life NO MATTER WHAT. See there were many blessings and lessons learned from the other night. So with that.........
Jim and I had a blast last night at one of our weekly dates. It wasn't anything spectacular -- but we made it awesome by being together, giggling, talking about food, people watching, appreciating how hard all the servers at Yard House in Temecula were working. They were working their cute little butts off! Way to go crew! We didn't talk about anything to do with cancer. We just were us. How great is that? For me, it was such joy. True 100% JOY. I've been teased in the past by others that think it's funny that I like the simple things in life. Well, now is one of those major times that simple is the way to go! I LIKE IT LIKE THAT as the song goes. It rings true now. I had a very scrumptuous meal of salad with a vinaigrette that was to die for; and a couple crab cakes. I was so happy. Those of you who know me and my food appreciation know I was humming to myself as I ate this DEE-LISH meal. My appetite hasn't been the best recently because of anxiety, so this was so nice to enjoy fresh, clean flavors. After our date, we simply came home and cuddled, made popcorn and played with the dogs and watched some mindless TV.
I really like baths -- I soak and surround myself with some good scents. I tried to meditate -- seemed to work. Maybe it's not the safest thing to do especially if I end up accidentally falling asleep, but it seemed to work. I felt so relaxed, but mindful of surroundings. It was about 5 - 6 minutes, but it's a start. For those of you out there that meditate, is this a bad idea? It just felt comfortable and seemed right. I hope you don't end up reading about me drowning because I was trying to relax -- that would be just wrong; wouldn't it? Yes, if you don't know by now, I'm a dork! Or some would say: Dingy -- whatever!!!! Either way, I am going to try different areas to meditate. I will be transforming my small bedroom into a little nest of sorts for meditating and yoga. I am going to sew up some pillows, get my candles in order and maybe put a little tiny water feature in there. I have some beautiful blow up "original" photos of specific areas in the Abruzzo region that I took with my camera while I lived there this past summer that I think would really be a beautiful addition t othe wall in there. I'm going to give it a try. What the heck.
So moving into Saturday.... I got to go and volunteer at the Animal Friends of the Valley animal shelter. I just love going there and helping out. Today I got to help adopt at least 3 dogs. One of which was a big guy and he as well as the others deserved to find a forever home. Talk about a sweet victory.
One adoption, in particular, made my heart swell for this little lady. She recently lost her husband of 64 years! That's such a lifetime of commitment; she also had to put down her old chocolate lab who was, I think, 14 years old. She was brought to the shelter by her son and daughter-in-law. What a nice family. They were so supportive of her needs. Well, I saw her looking at this little maltese cross I had been loving on. I asked her if she would like to meet her. The little lady said, "Oh, Yes." I opened the door of the kennel room. In it was a chair for her to sit on. So she sat there waiting -- my God she was so sweet. Her eyes just lit up. Then I placed the little dog on her lap. This little jewel of a dog nestled ever so gently into her lap leaning up again her as if this had been her "assumed position" always. The little lady started to talk with her and pet her. So what does the dog do? Oh, yeah, she's no fool -- she looked up at the little lady and licked her ever so gently. I thought the little lady would melt right then and there. I know I was. I got chills and my heart just swelled. Right then and there -- SOLD! Of course, I got choked up a bit. I never do, but for some reason, this little lady needed this love. Can you imagine losing someone after 64 years? It's longer than you ever lived with your parents. It's longer than some people live. I was moved. So after this initial love fest, she placed the dog down to see what she would do. Well, little miss smarty pants jumped right back up onto her lap. Way cool. I suggested then that the rest of her family come in and be introduced properly. They were so cute and excited for their mom. She found a companion. That's what this is all about. That's what's giving me joy. Once again, the simple things. It's working....... Then I had to go back and start picking up poop........LOL. How appropriate, right? LOL
Oh, well, someone has to do it; right?
Tonight, I'm going to hang with all the dogs at the house: Woody, Chewy,Choli and Chancho. Choli and Chancho are pugs that belong to my daughter Ashley and her boyfriend, Patrick. They are over for a few hours. I'm going to knit this new pattern I'm working on and going to watch yet another mindless movie. The weather is still not so great, but next week it's going to go back to the 70's and possibly into the 80's. I am going to continue to plant my new plants for my backyard. I actually got to plant a lemon tree and a lime tree last week. How cool is that? We couldn't plant these up in Northern California where we resided.
Still, my cup's half full.........Phew!
PS. I keep on forgetting to publicly THANK each and everyone who has been writing me, calling me, texting me, skyping with me from all over the world. I am eternally grateful to have you in my life. I can never repay you but I will love you all for a lifetime. SWAK (for those of you who don't know what that means: Sealed With A Kiss)
